A friend sent most of the following to me via email. I haven't researched yet to find out where this particular collection originated, but I thought I'd share it with my reader anyway. Rabbit week continues.
HUMOR FOR LEXOPHILES
(LOVERS OF WORDS)
1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
4. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
5. The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
6. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
7. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
8. A rabbit that attacks me is hare today and gone tomorrow.
9. The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it!
10. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.
11. The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
12. A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
13. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is just two-tired.
14. A will is a dead giveaway.
15. A backward poet writes inverse.
16. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
17. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
18. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulted in linoleum blownapart.
19. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
20. A calendar's days are numbered.
21. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
22. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
23. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
24. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
25. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
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